Last Minute Gift
by gaypokemontrainers
Summary: It's Silver's birthday and Gold has to come up with a good gift at the very last minute.


"_**Last Minute Gift"**_

Summary: It's Silver's birthday and Gold has to come up with a good gift at the very last minute.

Gold hesitated before studying a small calendar that adorned the wall. When finally gaining the courage to do so, beads of cold sweat formed under his bangs. He didn't want to believe what sight his eyes beheld, but there was no denying what day it was. Some were forced to recognize it as a national holiday. Kings were expected to step from their thrones as the date of December 24th arrived. Said date was none other than Silver's birthday and Gold knew he wouldn't be let off easy if his boyfriend didn't receive something tenfold greater than last year's gift. This was going to be a challenge.

Frantically, Gold searched his pockets, fishing out a nearly-empty wallet, a loose thread, the grocery list he earlier claimed was lost, and a pack of berry-flavored bubble-gum. Silver wouldn't accept any of those, obviously, and with little money, what was a guy to do? There were three options he could think of for this sort of dilemma: he could make a cheap purchase at the nearest facility, give Silver the best item he could find lingering within the apartment, or simply ask. Each idea had it's faults, no doubt. Gold knew himself as too oblivious to notice any bargain sales and what the hell would Silver want with yesterday's take-out or a seat cushion? Asking him, as well, could be risky. It didn't take much to anger Silver, and Gold, being the good boyfriend he was, should _'already know'_ what the red-head wanted for a birthday present. The hatcher sighed in defeat. He figured he'd give the first two options a try before resorting to the third. With that, he turned from the calendar and headed for the door.

In no time, Gold found himself entering the one place consumers world-wide called 'The Goldenrod Department Store,' god of all mercantile establishments within the Johto region. He was greeted by an elderly woman as he stepped through the sliding door. She glared at him as he sauntered past her, her wrinkled face twisting into a frown as she mumbled "welcome to the Goldenrod Department Store" in a bitter tone. Gold sped up his pace and forced a smile until he left her gaze. Now, it was time for business. He had to find something Silver would like, pay for it with pocket change, and go.

Gold had no idea where to begin, so he decided to make his way to the top floor. He figured he could work his way down while also having time to ponder about what defined a good, yet reasonably-priced gift. Once he arrived, he scanned the surrounding area. Everything was expensive. Of-fucking-course.

"Hey, kid," a voice spoke from behind the young man. "You look broke. Could I interest you in some discount figurines?"

"Discount?" The hatcher was sold upon hearing such a word. Turning around, he spotted a shady-looking man running a small stand that was temporarily set up within the building. He must have paid to sell his items there because he knew there would be guaranteed business. Very clever.

The man straightened up his posture and cleared his voice. "You heard right, sonny! Discount, as in _really cheap_. Are you interested?"

"Hell yeah," answered Gold with a mixture of great enthusiasm and relief. "Discount is my middle name! Well, not really, but you get my drift. Whatcha got goin' on there?" This was perfect. He was surely safe for another year!

Smiling, the man pulled out a box from the storage-area behind his stand. "These are top-notch figurines based off of popular characters from comic books and television programs. I crafted them myself and I'm, like, a pro."

He sure sounded legit, Gold thought, knowing exactly was he was about to ask next. "Sounds pretty sweet. Would you happen to have anything directly related to Proteam Omega?" Silver loved Proteam Omega; if Gold could score some merchandise of it, he was sure to make the read-head happy. He would probably get laid, too. That was a plus.

"I sure do, my friend! This is your lucky day!" the shady man exclaimed with a look in his eye that said he had a lot of it to sell. "Which of the main characters do you want?"

Oh, shit. Gold had to choose? He never exactly paid attention to the show when Silver watched it, so he had no clue which characters his boyfriend preferred. He had to think fast. "Uhh..." he began, scouring his mind for even the slightest of details, "how about the guy with the... thing?"

"The guy with the thing?"

"Y-yeah," Gold confirmed like an idiot.

The merchant nodded as if he had been given a clear answer. "I know exactly who you're talking about!"

"You do?" Gold was surely surprised. "I mean, yeah! Great!" He forced out a nervous chuckle as his supplier pulled out a cardboard box. It was the packaging for a common brand of chocolate bars, to be precise. Gold guessed the man must have fallen short of things to wrap his products in. That was fine, though, because he would just re-wrap it at home. If he had the right materials, he would even put a cute little bow on it.

"This will be 100 PokeDollars and I don't offer any refunds. It's a business policy."

What a perfect price! It was well within Gold's range, considering he only had about 116. "SOLD!" he yelled over the chatter that was being exchanged amongst other customers, dramatically slapping his money on the counter. "You have yourself a deal!"

"Splendid!" The man had a pleased look plastered upon his stubble-abundant face. "Make sure you tell your friends about these extremely low prices!"

Gold obtained the gift and pocketed his change. "I sure will," he lied, spinning away from the man. He had to get home as soon as possible. Once again, it looked like he had saved the day! Gold was so hardcore.

* * *

The sun was beginning to set by the time the hatcher returned to his lovely abode, gift in hand. Silver was going to love it; he was sure of that. Tonight was going to be a night to remember. Rushing through the front door, Gold kicked a pile of dirty laundry under the couch before sitting down. Silver could be home at any time, so he had to unwrap the newly-purchased figurine and have it ready in advance.

"Alright," muttered the 'best boyfriend ever.' He scratched at the tape that sealed the box until he could easily peel it off. "Let's see what's in here." Opening the box, he pulled out some bubble wrap and, finally, the Proteam Omega figurine. His jaw dropped when he laid eyes on it.

Right before him was the absolute worst excuse for a piece of merchandise. It was quite literally a ill-molded hunk of cheap plastic. That wasn't even the worst part, either! The thing didn't even have a solid paint-job! It had obviously been given poor care for quite a while before finally being sold. Gold went from feeling accomplished to feeling like a complete failure within a grand total of .02 seconds.

It was time to resort to Plan B. He had to find something around the house to give Silver because his purchase was a joke (and not the funny kind, either).

Gold shoved the epitome of bad creations under the couch and jumped up, searching every corner of the room. He did that without a single pause or break until he heard a noise. He was almost certain that it came from outside of the apartment. There was no doubt about it; Silver was home.

"Damn it! Come on, now. Think!" Gold commanded himself. What was something he could quickly shove into that cardboard box that would please Silver? Gold forced himself into instinct-mode and, suddenly, the hatcher hatched an idea. It was a risky idea, but it was an idea, nonetheless! "PERFECT!" He shouted, pulling down his pants- underwear and all. "Why didn't I think of this before!?" He threw himself on the couch once again, positioning himself on his back as he placed the open end of the box over his crotch. Just then, Silver entered the scene.

"Hey, there, hot stuff," Gold said in a smooth, nonchalant tone-of-voice. He winked shamelessly at his boyfriend as if to imply that lounging around half-naked with a box over his manhood was normal for him. "Come over here and open up your birthday gift. I've had this planned for weeks."

Silver should have expected as much. He pointed at the box, his expression blank. "What the fuck is that?"

Like the irresistible genius he was, Gold smiled with confidence and gave the redhead an answer that was short and sweet. "It's my dick- in a box." He added another wink for good measure. Nothing could go wrong at all. This gift was much better than a discount figurine! Too bad he had to realize that _after_ purchasing it. "What do you think?"

"Gold," the red-head stated, not amused. "Get out."


End file.
